I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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