walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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