i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize