is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
