Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Hippo gnu deer
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
