i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
It's blow job season.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Randomize
