so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
A+ Viking dick
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
