im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I will be naked everywhere
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
