Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
