Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
