worst night to have a conscience
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
areolas are like halos for boobs.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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