There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
