hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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