I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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