dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
