the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
