# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
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