I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
