nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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