Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Randomize