They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
