This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Randomize
