I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I think people are normalizing furries
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
