Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
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