Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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