So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
