Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize