It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
