Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
