The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize