Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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