She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize