I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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