I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Randomize
