i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
