i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
