Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
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