we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
