we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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