she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Randomize
