Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
