Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
How does it feel to date your dad?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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