Pappa wants mamma naked
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
