If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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