WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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