You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
