your parents love me but you hate me
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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