goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize