His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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