whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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