that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize