I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
She even gives head with a lisp.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
